Authors & Speakers Network Blog with Larry James

Monday, November 27, 2017

Specificity Builds Your Credibility

Filed under: Speaker Tips — Larry James @ 10:30 am
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Patricia Fripp, Guest Author

In the speaking industry, I am known for a phrase: “Specificity builds credibility.” I learned it from one of my colleagues in Silicon Valley, David Palmer. Every day I listen to intelligent, experienced engineers, leaders, experts in every field, and they are sloppy speakers.

If you want to build your credibility, listen to what you say. Record casual conversations, your side of the phone call, and the way you lead meetings, and you will find how often intelligent people use the word stuff. Stuff is debris and rubbish. What do you mean?

In everyday conversation, of course, we do not prepare what we’re going to say, and it is more logical to be non-specific. However, the best and most important conversations and presentations are better if you review and build skills into your everyday language.

The question I ask my clients more than any other is, “Specifically, what do you mean by thing?” I recently listened to an expert. I am a big fan of his expertise on marketing, and for the first hour I listened to every comment he made and every time he said thing, which was about 25, I considered two suggestions of what he probably meant.

The next big offender is tons. You do not get tons of ideas; you get three pages of notes or 16 actionable items. After a networking event I hear people say, “Oh, I met tons of interesting people.” No, you didn’t. You met two dozen interesting people with whom you probably had seven meaningful conversations; two you will follow up for business conversations; and two you are looking forward to seeing socially.

Be specific. Specificity builds your credibility, and the more credibility you have in any position you hold, the more you will succeed.

BONUS Articles:Things We Say Wrong ~ Video+
The Importance of the Pause When Speaking

Patricia_Fripp.jpgCopyright 2017 by Patricia Fripp, CSP, CPAE. For additional help with your presentation delivery read: “Sometimes It’s Better Not to Speak,” “Are You Speaking Too Quickly?,” and “Public Speaking – Delivery Strategy.” These are just a few of the many complimentary resources on Fripp.com

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

commentNOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Monday, August 10, 2015

The Importance of the Pause When Speaking

One of the first lessons I learned as a professional speaker was to pause for effect. Learn to use your voice to create impact, suspense and credibility when speaking. Without the pause a speaker’s ideas and messages might even be lost as a result. It’s a signal to our audience that we are moving to a new point. I also use the pause when I move from one main point of my speech to another. It’s important to speak at a reasonable pace – not too fast for the audience to absorb our message, but at the same time, not too slowly as to bore our audience, and cause them to mentally go south.

Keep in mind the pause should be long enough to build suspense. Keep eye contact with your audience to signal that this pause is intentional. You can also use the pause to gain the attention of your audience, by pausing intentionally before you say something important. Comedians are masters of the pause. They often use the pause very effectively just before the deliver the punch line. If you’re using humor in your speech, the timing of your pause is everything.

A&S-PauseMany inexperienced speakers make the mistake of memorizing their speeches word-for-word and then reciting them as quickly as possible, without stopping even to take a breath. An experienced speaker knows to pause periodically to give the audience time to “catch up,” and to allow the meaning of what he or she is saying to sink in.

My friend, Patricia Fripp, CSP, CPAE, interviewed her friend and fellow speech coach, Ron Arden. He shared this helpful explanation of nine types of pauses and how and when to use them.

Powerful and persuasive presenters recognize the importance of the pause. Alan Alda says, “It is the stuff between the lines that makes it a great performance.”

Your message is not simply conveyed by your words, but also by your pauses. A pause isn’t a moment of “nothing.” Used strategically, it is a tool to help you build intellectual and emotional connection with your audience. When you pause, you give your audience time to process what you have just said. A pause allows your listeners to stay engaged and enables them to follow what comes next. If you tend to speak rapidly, it is even more important to allow adequate time for pauses.

Imagine where you would have a comma, period, paragraph, an exclamation point, an underline, or ellipses if your talk were written out. Use this as a guide for pauses.

1. Sense Pause

The sense pause is roughly where a comma would be in writing, but occurs about twice as frequently. This pause is more frequent than the comma because, in writing if your audience cannot understand something they can re-read it. Since this isn’t possible in speaking, you must allow time for your audience to understand. This is a way of grouping words in small “parcels” so they audience can keep up with what you are saying. This pause usually lasts one-half to one second.

2. Transition Pause

The transition pause is approximately where a period would be in writing. It separates one thought from another. Many speakers are unaware that they are speaking in run-on sentences. Audiences are not able to process rapid speech as well as we might think they can, especially if the content is unusual, emotional, poetic, dramatic, or new to the audience. This pause lasts between one and two seconds.

3. Dramatic Pause

A dramatic pause is a pause is used to set up and spotlight what you will say next. For example, “Do you know what happened?”… (pause)… (pause)… (pause)… This heightens tension in your narrative and gets the audience involved. You have to earn a dramatic pause, by following it with a statement that rewards your audience for following along with you. A dramatic pause can be anywhere from three – seven seconds.

4. Reflective Pause

A reflective pause gives your audience time to reflect. Complex or unusual statements need to be followed by time for reflection. This type of pause indicates to your audience, “I want you to think about that…” “I’ve left a space for you to think…” A reflective pause can last from three to seven seconds.

5. Pause for Effect

A pause for effect is shorter, usually one to two seconds. It creates the feeling that something is going to happen and lets words hang in the air so the audience can play with them in their minds.

These last four are advanced uses of the pause you can implement to add finesse to your public speaking.

6. Spontaneity Pause

This pause creates the feeling of spontaneity. This is a technique that conveys you are thinking about your words as you are speaking and not simply reciting something you have said many times before. This will keep you and your audience members interested, even if you are very familiar with what you are saying.

7. Pause to Relinquish Control

This is particularly useful in Q & A situations. When responding to a question, is easy to fall into the trap of rambling, repeating yourself, and weakening your response. Nail your response to the question and then pause to indicate your are finished speaking.

8. Sensory Pause

Use this to support a description that appeals to the senses. For example, “A beautiful warm afternoon… (pause) ….imagine it… (pause) …willows softly rustling in the breeze… (pause) …birds chirping in the trees… (pause) …sitting with a cool glass of lemonade in your hand… (pause). Create heightened feeling in your audience by pausing to allow their senses to take hold.

9. Pause for Emphasis

The enemy of the speaker is sameness. An audience will get bored if they feel like you are saying thing over and over again, even if you are not. Use pauses to delineate your key points. Keep your presentation dynamic so your audience does not get lulled to sleep. Use pauses to change gears.

Remember, a speech is not a monologue unless your audience is asleep or dead. A speech is a dialogue between your words and each audience member’s inner dialogue. Pauses allow your audience members to mentally interact with your words. A skilled speaker will often engage their audience more with their pauses than with their speaking.

Copyright 2015 by Patricia Fripp, CSP, CPAE. My complete interview with Ron Arden is available from my podcasts page: http://www.fripp.com/public-speaking-resources/podcasts/ For additional help with your presentation delivery read: “Sometimes It’s Better Not to Speak,” “Are You Speaking Too Quickly?,” and “Public Speaking – Delivery Strategy.” These are just a few of the many complimentary resources on Fripp.com

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

commentNOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Tuesday, June 23, 2015

A Cheat Sheet for Public Speaking

This infographic from LondonSpeakerBureau.com offers nine steps to a memorable speech, from preparation to delivery.

become-public-speaking-expert-infographic

Copyright © 2015 – LondonSpeakerBureau.com.

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

the-archives2Click for Archives! ~ Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

commentNOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
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Thursday, May 14, 2015

How to Give a Great Speech ~ Part Two

NOTE: You may want to read “How to Give a Great Speech” Part One before you read Part Two.

Earl Nightingale, Guest Author

Don’t be a comedian

Humor isn’t something that can be forced, nor should it be reached for. It’s something that comes naturally to those with the ability, or at least it seems to. If you have it, congratulations. Use it wisely. If you don’t have it, use it sparingly and make certain it’s really funny before you use it at all. Don’t try to dabble in one of the most difficult professions in the world — that of a stand-up comedian.

A&SGreatSpeech2Before you include a joke in your speech, ask yourself this: Why am I telling it? Jokes aren’t necessary to the opening of a speech. Neither are funny comments, unless they have a clever tie-in of some sort that the audience will genuinely appreciate and enjoy.

I’ve heard so many tedious speakers say, following the introduction, “That reminds me of a story …” and then proceed to tell a story that hasn’t the faintest resemblance to anything said in the introduction at all. It didn’t remind him. He just wanted to tell a joke, and everybody in the audience knows it and begins to move their feet and cough and look around for the exit.

Here’s a good rule to follow that I’ve found works. If there is any doubt in your mind whatever, if there is the faintest feeling of uneasiness about a story, never tell it. That feeling of uneasiness is your more intelligent subconscious trying to tell you to forget it. Save if for the locker room at the club if you must tell it.

If you want a foolproof system, use the enormously successful Jack Benny system: Make yourself the joke. Benny has produced the most prolonged, helpless laughter in the history of show business. It happened on his old radio program when he was approached by a robber who said, “Your money or your life.” What followed was simply silence, the deadly, convulsively funny silence that only Jack Benny could manage. The silence lasted only a few seconds when the laughter began, then mounted and mounted and continued for a record-breaking period of time, I think something like 15 minutes. Finally, when it did subside, the robber repeated, “I said your money or your life.” And Jack Benny replied, “I’m thinking. I’m thinking.”

Again the laughter took hold and the program nearly ran out of time before it could even attempt to finish. A simple silence did it as Jack tried desperately to decide which was more important to him, his money or his life. He was always the loser in his elaborate plans, as is the coyote in his attempts to trap the road runner. People love us when we’re foiled by our own weaknesses.

If humor is your forte, then you don’t need any advice or help from me. If it isn’t, use it sparingly and in good taste. It’s wonderful when it’s right. It’s so awful when it isn’t.

Speak with style

I was a speaker at a hospital benefit, and as I waited in the wings of a large theater where the benefit was being staged, I noticed that one of the officials for the evening was on stage in front of the lectern reading the names of the various high school graduates from the community who had won scholarships in nursing. He never looked up at the audience. He spoke in such low monotones that he was difficult to hear, even with an excellent audio system, and his performance was as lackluster as any I’ve ever seen. When he was through, he walked back to where I was standing in the wings. As he disappeared from view to the audience, his face broke with a beautiful broad smile, and he said in a strong voice, “Man, am I glad that’s over.” I stopped him and I said, “You should have flashed that wonderful smile to the audience and used your normal voice. It’s excellent.” “Oh, that,” he shuddered. “I’m scared to death out there.”

Now, the audience got a picture of a very lackluster man with no personality and no style whatsoever, a total cipher. Yet, here was a good-looking man with a beautiful smile, an excellent style of his own that his friends and acquaintances no doubt greatly admired. I wanted to go on stage and say to that great audience. “I wish you could see so-andso as he really is. He’s quite a guy.”

Everyone has his or her own special style. It seems to come with the genes and the upbringing and the education, all of thousands of experiences that coalesce to form a person’s own unique style.

You have only to study prominent people on television to quickly see that each of them has a style all his or her own that he or she is completely unconscious of. Just as we should never doubt our hunches or our own unique powers, we should never doubt that we have a natural style. If, and it’s a big if — if we can be natural.

The key is to lose ourselves in our material. In an ideal speech, we are conscious of putting on a performance, but at the same time we’re so interested in what we’re talking about and we know our subject so thoroughly, we can immerse ourselves in it.

I was chatting with a salesman on an airplane one time. It turned out we were both going to the same convention. I had to speak. He had to receive his company’s highest honor as national sales leader. As our conversation grew more animated, I asked him the secret of being number one in sales with his company. And he gave me the most interesting answer. He said, “I was in this business for several years, and I tried hard and I worked hard, but I was a long way from the top. Then one day, a wonderful thing happened. All of a sudden, things were turned around. Instead of my being in this business, the business got into me.”

He looked at me and his eyes were shining, and he asked, “Do you know what I mean?” I told him I knew exactly what he meant and he could number himself among the most fortunate human beings on earth, the people who actually enjoy what they’re doing, the real stars. It reminded me of John Stuart Mill’s theory of happiness in his book Utilitarianism. He said that only those people who do not seek happiness directly are happy. People who spend their time helping others and are engaged in some art or pursuit — followed not by a means, but as itself an ideal end — find happiness along the way. The important part is that those who are the happiest are engaged in a daily pursuit, followed not just as a means, but as itself an ideal end. And it’s the same in making a fine speech.

BONUS Article: The Communicator’s Job – Can You Improve Your Speaking and Writing?

Copyright © 2015 – Earl Nightingale. Earl Nightingale was the author of Lead the Field. To read more articles by Earl Nightingale, “Life of the Unsuccessful” (Mar/Apr 2006), “The Cure for Procrastination” (Sep/Oct 2005), and “The Strangest Secret” (Nov/Dec 2004), visit www.AdvantEdgeMag.com/Nightingale today.

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationships” BLOG at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking” BLOG at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Weddings” BLOG at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
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Wednesday, May 6, 2015

How to Give a Great Speech ~ Part One

Earl Nightingale, Guest Author

There are two kinds of public speakers: There are those who are asked to talk to a group and those who, because of their position, are forced to talk before groups — people such as ministers, teachers, executives, and sales managers.

In the first instance ”that is, if you’re asked to make a speech” it means you know something others want to hear. It usually means you’re an expert on some subject, and so people come to hear you because they want to. If your job demands that you talk before groups, you have an even greater responsibility because your audience must listen to you whether they like it or not.

A&SGreatSpeech1But in either case, you can make a good speech with a little preparation. Here are some guidelines.

A good speech is like good conversation

A good conversationalist will make a good speaker. He’s sensitive to the presence of others. His antennae are forever alert, picking up signals from his audience and involving them in his talk.

Good conversation is one of the great joys of human commerce. Good conversation should be like the game of tennis, in which the ball is struck back and forth, with each player participating equally. Bores are like golfers who just keep hitting their own ball, over and over and over again.

A good speaker is able to achieve a marvelous give-and-take with her audience, just as a good conversationalist does with the person she’s with. She recognizes that people in our society desire recognition more than any other factor.

She will ask her audience questions such as, “Do you agree with that?” Then she’ll pause and read their response — by their silence, their attention, their nods, their poking of the person sitting next to them, by their laughter, or by their seriousness at the right places.

If they’re bored, they’ll find ways of showing it, despite their best efforts. If they’re interested, they’ll show that too. And we have a duty to be interesting or we shouldn’t get up there in the first place. That is the task of the speaker, whether we’re the manager of the sales force, in a car dealership, an insurance agency, real estate office, or a large international organization. When interest leaves, the sell goes out of our message.

Our responsibility is not only to create a speech that will lead an audience to a believable conclusion; we must also make the very building blocks of that conclusion as fascinating as we can. It is in this way that we can hold the attention of our audience until we get to that all-important final point. In addition, if we can develop techniques that make our audience feel that we are conversing with them, we will convey that we care what they are thinking — and that will create the emotional climate for them to accept us as favorably as possible.

The single-theme formula

Professional salespeople, marketing experts, and leaders in the advertising profession know the importance of selling one thing at a time. Only catalogs can successfully handle a multitude of items. In a five-minute speech or even a long speech, it’s important to have a single theme, and, like a good salesperson, you pose the problem and then give your solution. At the end, the problem is restated and the solution quickly summarized.

Your opening statement should be an attention getter. For example, you might say, “Scientists all over the world are agreed that the world’s oceans are dying.” A sobering thought indeed. It captures immediate interest, and everyone is thinking, “Why, that would presage the end of the world. What are we doing about it?”

Using an internationally recognized authority as your reference, someone such as Jacques Cousteau, you provide the supporting evidence that your opening remark is indeed true, and then you proceed to outline the possible ways that the disaster might be averted. At the end, you might say, “Yes, the oceans of the world are dying today, but if we can marshal the combined efforts of the world’s peoples, if we can influence every maritime country to pass laws governing the pollution of the seas by oil tankers …” So you end on a note of hope and at the same time enlist the sympathy of every one of your listeners in your cause.

Not all talks are about social problems, of course. You might be talking about a recent fishing trip, in which case, you find something of special interest in the story and open with that. You might say “Ounce for ounce, the rainbow trout is one of the gamest fish on earth.” It’s a much better attention getter and interest stimulator than saying, “I want to tell you about my recent fishing trip.” A few words about the fish you were after, and then you can work in the rest. “Two weeks ago, John Cooper and I decided to try our luck on the White River near Carter, Arkansas. It’s one of the most naturally beautiful spots in the country” and so on. Stay with the trip and that rainbow trout, the hero of your story, and how good it tasted cooked over an open fire on the bank of the river. Then at the close, to more closely link your listeners to the subject, you might say, “If you’ve never been trout fishing, let me recommend it as one of the world’s best ways to forget your problems, clear your brain, and gain a new perspective. And when you hook a rainbow trout, you’re in for one of the greatest thrills of a lifetime.”

Watch your personal pronouns. Keep yourself out of your conversation as much as possible. As with the case of the fishing story, talk about the fish, the beautiful scenery, and your companions, other people you met, a humorous incident or two perhaps, but don’t keep saying, ” I did this” and “I did that.” The purpose of the speech is not to talk about you but rather the subject matter. There’s an old saying that small minds talk about things, average minds talk about people, and great minds talk about ideas. What you’re selling is almost always an idea, even if it’s painting the house. The idea is the good appearance or the protection of the house. The fishing trip story is about the idea of getting away and going after exciting game fish. One idea, well developed, is the key.

Just as a beautiful painting is put together by a thousand brush strokes, each stroke makes a contribution to the main theme, the overall picture. And it’s the same with a good speech.

Read “How to Give a Great Speech” Part Two @ How to Give a Great Speech ~ Part Two!

Copyright © 2015 – Earl Nightingale. Earl Nightingale was the author of Lead the Field. To read more articles by Earl Nightingale, “Life of the Unsuccessful” (Mar/Apr 2006), “The Cure for Procrastination” (Sep/Oct 2005), and “The Strangest Secret” (Nov/Dec 2004), visit www.AdvantEdgeMag.com/Nightingale today.

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationships” BLOG at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Networking” BLOG at: http://NetworkingHQ.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Weddings” BLOG at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
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Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Five Speaking Rules You Can Break

Joe Calloway, Guest Author

As with almost anything else you read about the speaking business, these ideas may or may not work for you. They work for me. As the old saying goes, “Sacred cows make the best burgers.” Here are, in my opinion, five rules of speaking that you can break:

5speakingrulesRule You Can Break Number 1: Memorize, rehearse, and make your speech perfect. ~ That’s one option. Or, you can be utterly in the moment with your audience. Not reciting a presentation “at” them, but being in the moment “with” them.

Of course, I quite naturally went the route of being very conversational and interactive with my audiences, since I can barely remember my own phone number, much less memorize a speech. In fact, on my website it clearly states that “Joe doesn’t do traditional ‘speeches.’”

I go off on tangents with the audience. I lose my place. I abandon 50% of my planned presentation if the CEO speaks before me and says something that inspires a totally different approach. Speakers who observe me are often horrified. So far, it’s working out okay.

Rule You Can Break Number 2: Develop multiple income streams. ~ Let me defer here to Peter Sheahan’s 2012 presentation at the NSA Convention. Peter pointed out that a blue tip flame has more power and effect than a flamethrower.

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You don’t have to feel like a slacker because you aren’t doing webinars, downloadable training programs, interactive web-based assessments, etc. As Peter said, “You can just do keynotes.” Or training, or coaching, or consulting.

Pick a lane. You can have fun and make a fortune.

Rule You Can Break Number 3: Never do anything on social media that doesn’t drive revenue. ~ Sometimes a speaker will say to me, “Joe, I don’t understand your social media strategy. Why did you post the ‘Thunderstruck’ video by AC/DC?”

I get more positive comments from clients when I post a good AC/DC video, than I do when I try to sell them something. Personally, I don’t want to hang out with anybody whose only relationship with me is that they want into my wallet.

Rule You Can Break Number 4: My speech (book, video, etc.) is wonderful. I need to spend my time selling it. ~ When I do a presentation for 500 people, in my mind I am making 500 sales calls. They are watching me work and, if I am amazing as what I do, they are likely to hire me or have influence on someone who can hire me.

I don’t have time to waste trying to reach people who have never heard of me. I’m too busy working on my next presentation in an effort to get hired by people who will perceive irresistible value in what I do.

Rule You Can Break Number 5: Just work. Take any job because you’re better off speaking than not speaking. ~ Good grief. Really? I mean REALLY? My career didn’t begin to take off until I got clarity on the work I shouldn’t do. The more I said “no” to bad jobs, the more I attracted the kind of work I wanted and did best.

Disclaimer: All of the above is what works for me. It might not work for you. (Which is true whenever any speaker tells you anything about what you “have” to do.)

Joe-CallowayCopyright © 2014 – Joe Calloway. Reprinted with permission. Joe Calloway, CSP, CPAE, is a leading performance expert who helps great companies get even better. He helps organizations focus on what is truly important, inspires constant improvement, and motivates people to immediate action. Joe has been a business author, coach, and speaker for 30 years and his client list reads like an international Who’s Who in business, ranging from companies like Coca Cola and IBM to Cadillac and American Express. Joe is a popular speaker for business meetings and events, and although he has been inducted into the Speakers Hall of Fame, he doesn’t do traditional “speeches.” Instead, Joe actively engages people in highly interactive keynote sessions that challenge people to take action on what matters most in their businesses. His newest book is, “Be The Best At What Matters Most: The Only Strategy You’ll Ever Need.” Visit Joe’s Website @ www.JoeCalloway.com.

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Larry James is a professional speaker and the author of three relationship books, “How to Really Love the One You’re With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship,” “LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing” and “Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers.” His newest book is “Ten Commitments of Networking.” Larry James also offers “Author & Speaker” coaching. Contact: AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. CelebrateLove@cox.net – More than 110 articles especially for Authors & Speakers at: www.AuthorsandSpeakersNetwork.com

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com and CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles and “LoveNotes” listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationships” BLOG at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com
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Joe Calloway – 615-429-7600
CSP, CPAE, business author, speaker, coach at Joe Calloway
Joe Calloway, CSP, CPAE, is the author of “Be The Best At What Matters Most.”

For information email Joe Calloway or Kris Young:
Kris: 612-803-9190
Joe: 615-429-7600
PO Box 158309
Nashville, TN 37215

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Speaking in Public: Two Errors That Lead to Fear

Filed under: Speaker Tips — Larry James @ 7:30 am
Tags: , , ,

Seth Godin, Guest Author

1. You believe that you are being actively judged

2. You believe that the subject of the talk is you

When you stand up to give a speech, there’s a temptation to believe that the audience is actually interested in you.

SpeakingFEARThis just isn’t true. (Or if it is, it doesn’t benefit you to think that it is).

You are not being judged, the value of what you are bringing to the audience is being judged. The topic of the talk isn’t you, the topic of the talk is the audience, and specifically, how they can use your experience and knowledge to achieve their objectives.

When a professional singer sings a song of heartbreak, his heart is not breaking in that moment. His performance is for you, not for him. (The infinite self-reference loop here is that the professional singer finds what he needs when you find what you need.)

The members of the audience are interested in themselves. The audience wants to know what they can use, what they can learn, or at the very least, how they can be entertained.

If you dive into your (irrelevant to the listener) personal hurdles, if you try to justify what you’ve done, if you find yourself aswirl in a whirlpool of the resistance, all you’re providing is a little schadenfreude – pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune – as a form of entertainment.

On the other hand, if you realize that you have a chance to be generous in this moment, to teach and to lead, you can leave the self-doubt behind and speak a truth that the audience needs to hear. When you bring that to people who need it, your fear pales in comparison.

Media you choose to do is always about the audience. That’s why you’re doing it. The faster we get over ourselves, the sooner we can do a good job for those tuning in.

Copyright © 2013. Seth Godin. Seth Godin has written thirteen books that have been translated into more than thirty languages. Every one has been a bestseller. He writes about the post-industrial revolution, the way ideas spread, marketing, quitting, leadership and most of all, changing everything. Seth is the founder of The Domino Project. Check Seth’s Blog.

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Larry James is a Professional Speaker, Author and Coach. Larry James presents networking seminars nationally and offers Networking coaching; one-on-one or for your Networking Group! Invite Larry James to speak to your group! His latest book is, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections! Something NEW about Networking is posted on this Networking BLOG every 4th day! Visit Larry’s Networking Website at: “Networking HQ!”

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: Larry James, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateLove.com

NOTE: All articles and networking tips listed in this BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Add Larry James as a “friend” to your Facebook page: http://www.Facebook.com/larry.james
Follow Larry’s “once daily” Relationship Tweet at: http://www.Twitter.com/larryjames
Follow Larry’s “Relationship BLOG” at: http://CelebrateLove.wordpress.com/
Follow Larry’s “Wedding BLOG” at: http://CelebrateIntimateWeddings.wordpress.com
Follow Larry’s “Authors & Speakers” BLOG at: http://www.AuthorsandSpeakerNetwork.wordpress.com/

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